The Online Rant

What is tolerance? Am I tolerant of other peoples beliefs? These are questions that have been running through my head since I had a disturbing conversation with a friend of mine. She accused me of being intolerant because I told her that I believed her belief system was wrong. The accusation caught me completely by surprise.
To understand why I was so surprised, I need to give you a little background about myself and about the conversation we were having. I’m an extremely non-confrontational person. So unless I know the person very well, I avoid having conversations with people about religion, politics, and belief systems. I avoid them like the plague. I have definite opinions and beliefs, but am much happier agreeing to disagree with someone than I am arguing them with. If I think that voicing my beliefs to a person will cause conflict, I usually just stay quiet.

So back to this particular person who thinks I am intolerant. I’ve known this person for several years. She has a rather forceful personality and is just about the opposite from me when it comes to conflict and voicing her opinions. So needless to say, I’ve known almost as long as I’ve known her, that her opinions and beliefs were strongly in conflict with mine.

Anyway, she and a few other people were having a discussion about the existence of God and hell. Everyone present, including her, knows that I’m a Christian. But I was mostly keeping out of the discussion. Unfortunately this time, I was not allowed to keep out of it. She started pressing me about whether I believed non-Christians would really go to hell. I didn’t really want to tell her yes, because I knew that would upset her. So I tried to deflect the question, but she wouldn’t let me. So I finally told her that yes I did believe that. She then said the following, “Well I don’t believe that. Are you saying you think I’m wrong?” Since I had already put myself into hot water with her, I figured I might as well go all the way. So I told her that yes, I thought that her belief was wrong. That is when I she accused me of being intolerant of her beliefs.

So back to my original question. What is tolerance? And am I intolerant?
Well, I don’t really think I’m “intolerant.” I strongly believe that everyone has the right to believe what they want to believe. I don’t think anyone should, or even can, be forced to believe in something that is contrary to what they “believe.” I have no problem accepting people who believe differently from me, as evidenced by the fact that I’ve been friends with this person for several years. So why did she tell me that I’m intolerant?

I think it is because she, and much of our current culture, has redefined the meaning of tolerance. Tolerance to me means that I put up with and “tolerate” beliefs I don’t like, and that I think are wrong. In her mind that isn’t true tolerance. She has equated tolerance of beliefs with acceptance and equality of beliefs. In her mind, in order for me to tolerate her beliefs, I must also accept that they are equally as correct as mine. Which is impossible. Since they are contradictory, they cannot both be right. One or the other must be wrong.

I personally am incapable of taking that strange middle ground that she wants me to. A place where somehow both views are right at the same time. I simply can’t do that. I either need to abandon my belief and take hers, or I need to believe that her belief is wrong. One or the other is wrong. I’ve taken the position that her belief is wrong, but I’ve also taken the position that she has the right to be wrong. Does that make me intolerant?

Recently I’ve been thinking a lot about motivation. What motivates you to do the things you do? Specifically what motivates you at your job? Is it money? Recognition? Perks? The work itself? What exactly makes you get up every morning and go to your job?
You say, that’s easy. I get paid to work there, and I wouldn’t go if they didn’t pay me. And that’s true. None of us would go to work if we weren’t getting paid. After all, we all have bills to pay and we need to eat. But that isn’t the whole picture either.

So aside from being able to pay bills, why your current job over some other job? When you are at work, what makes you more eager to do certain jobs, rather than other jobs? What makes you feel satisfied with the work you are doing?

Everyone has different things that motivate them. For some, the motivation is money. They work harder in anticipation of bonuses and pay raises. For others, work needs to challenge them. If it doesn’t challenge their abilities, then it becomes a drag. They always need to be learning or trying something new. For still others, it’s the work environment. Interacting with their fellow coworkers and customers makes them feel alive and excites them. Some people, like my brother, need for things to be a competition. They have to be the best, and will work as hard as they have to in their job to “be the best.”

For me, it’s not any of the reasons I listed above. Sure, money is important, and it’s nice to have a challenge. And who doesn’t want to be the best? But for me it’s responsibility. I need to be “needed.” Knowing that people are depending on me pushes me to work harder. I have to know that people are counting on me to be there on time, and to get things done on schedule. It’s having people come to me for help and assistance, that really motivates me to try harder and do a good job.

So I ask again, What motivates you?

By the way, the picture above is from Despair.com They have a lot of other un-motivational posters and calendars that are pretty funny.

Recently the MPAA, under a lot of pressure from the anti tobacco lobbying groups, agreed to begin using the presence of smoking in a movie as one of the criteria in its rating system. Previously whether characters in a movie smoked was not considered when rating a movie. Read the story Here. While they haven’t yet committed to it,they are under heavy pressure to give an automatic R rating to any movie that depicts smoking under any conditions besides those showing the smoker dying or in the hospital of smoking related health issues.

I’m no fan of smoking. I think it is a nasty and expensive habit. Cigarettes cost a great deal. And yes, I do know that a lot of that cost is artificially inflated by law to try to force people to quit. But that doesn’t change the fact that under our current system, they are very expensive. The other thing is that they make you smell pretty bad. Unless you are used to the smell, it is actually nauseating. So if you are already hooked on smoking, you really should do your best to quit just for those two reasons. But of course it gets worse. Smoking is also extremely bad for you, and will likely kill you. So you really should stay clear of it.

I said all of that to make it clear that I don’t like smoking. The problem is that I don’t think that our society should attempt to enforce codes of behavior on people simply because we don’t like the behavior. Codes of behavior should only be enforced when the objectionable behavior harms other individuals besides the one doing the action. Since I don’t think smoking harms anyone but the smoker, I don’t see any reason why we should try to force people to stop. Yes, I know all about second hand smoke. Do the research. I think you will find that all of the more modern studies show that unless you are living with the smoker, second hand smoke is less dangerous than the smog you get in a big city.

So I ask, does smoking by characters in a movie hurt anyone? Would it have been a good thing for the Lord of the Rings movies to be rated R?